We all know that only about 40 percent of reality television bears any resemblance to reality, and the other 60 percent is just badly-scripted primetime soap drama with sufficient product placement to offset the fact that the entire audience is fast-forwarding through the commercials.
But usually, major events like weddings are legit occurrences in the lives of the cast members.
Which is why Vanderpump Rules fans were shocked to learn this week that Katie Maloney and Tom Schwartz are not actually married.
Maloney and Schwartz’s wedding was featured on the show back in Season 5.
It was a memorable occasion for many reasons, not the least of which is Tom’s baffling decision to bathe in a freakin’ river beforehand.
Anyway, it turns out that despite exchanging vows on camera, Tom and Katie are not are not legally wed and never have been.
The news was accidentally revealed by Lance Bass of NSync in a recent podcast interview.
Bass apparently officiated the recent wedding of Jax Taylor and Brittany Cartwright, and when the topic of Vanderpump marriages came up, he had some surprising things to say about the first SUR couple to tie the knot:
“So, yeah, I hope that [Jax and Brittany] are married because we just found out that Tom and Katie are not married,” Bass said.
“They did not send in their materials right. So, they are not married.”
Bass followed up on his comments during a Good Morning America interview on Wednesday:
“Lot of times people forget that I’ve been in entertainment news for the last 15 years,” he said.
“So, you know, when there’s pieces of nuggets out there, I’m going to talk about it.”
“I didn’t know it was a secret,” Bass added.
“I don’t know reality television like that. I apologize, I’m sorry. You’ll just have to watch. You’ll have to see the show to see what really happens.”
Uh … casually dropping bombshell information during an interview and then teasing that fans will have to tune in to the show to see how it all plays out?
Sounds like Lance understands a lot about reality television. But we digress …
The important thing is that it looks as though the upcoming season of Vanderpump will feature not one, but two weddings.
E! News has confirmed that Tom and Katie have obtained a marriage license, and based on their latest Instagram activity, it seems the entire VPR cast is currently assembled in Las Vegas.
(Well, all except for Billie Lee, who quit the show last week. Of course, it seems unlikely that Katie would’ve invited the SUR hostess, anyway …)
Tom and Katie’s second ceremony sounds like a quickie affair, and on the show, it’ll probably be overshadowed by Jax and Brittany’s nuptials.
We suppose that’s fair, considering Schwartz and Maloney already had one televised wedding.
But hey, at least it’ll spare us from this entire season being devoted to Jax and Brit’s planning process … especially considering that process already ate up a ton of screentime last season.
And hey, smart move on Katie’s part getting married in the middle of a desert — it might force Tom to bathe in an actual shower this time!